Month: February 2018

Use Your Energy to Create GOOD Daily

I have to admit, I struggle at times  It can prove difficult to make it through some days without feeling being attacked and overwhelmed by horrific news and graphic images swarming social media outlets. There are many times I have experienced a sensory overload and a gut wrenching despair for people I have never met. Truthfully, it can feel immobilizing and discouraging, causing a questioning of the future direction of humanity.

We often feel a desire to be of help and become frustrated in the knowing of how. There is a tendency to focus on large acts of generosity and kindness to make a difference.  This is not always possible due to time and limited resourcing. Though such thoughtfulness is amazing, it is not the only significant avenue towards being of assistance.

One thing to realize is though big events and moments generate a lot of attention and discussion, small gestures of kindness and compassion are infinitely IMPACTING.  This is due to the fact that they tend to be highly personalized (e.g. person to person) and the timing of their allowance is when a person is in the most need. I have witnessed through my work how small acts of kindness from strangers unzip emotionally, head to toe, those I work with in a profound and beautiful way.  Life delivered a powerful message to the receiving person in that moment that they carry forth into life.

My encouragement to you is that you can use your energy to create good EVERY SINGLE DAY.  This is simply by being the most genuine version of you and by showing compassion and gratitude. This just requires you to be engaged and aware of simple daily exchanges.  Here are some suggestions to consider in your daily practice of creating good through your energy:

  • Take care of YOU.  You being in a genuinely happy and contented state of being automatically contributes, on an energetic level, to the collective whole. You may have had experience when interacting with someone who seems full of light and love, leaving a positive imprint on you, JUST from their state of emotional being. Be that person for another. Do not exaggerate or pretend, this only works if you are actually truly in that emotional space.
  • Invest in Self-care and Boundaries.  It is critical that you do not overextend. You becoming under-resourced does not serve your own well-being nor that of others. Be attuned to your own needs and ensure you respect the bounds of your limitations. Appreciate what you do have to offer and trust me, those receiving will as well.
  • Be Genuine in Your Interactions.  Model acceptance of your own true emotions and awareness of areas of growth. People are so critical of themselves and often believe others “have it all together”. It is amazingly helpful to know others share a similar feeling or struggle. It increases one’s sense of value since it seems less about some internal deficits and more about the challenges of living.
  • Be Patient and Understanding.  This is highly impactful on those around you: Friends, family, partners, kids and co-workers.  Never underestimate the value of simply listening when you have nothing more to offer.
  • Model and Cultivate Empathy:   Before becoming defensive and assuming negative intent, either reflect or ask about, a person’s intent in behavior. Perhaps the driver who cut you off is not quite the jerk you thought and may be rushing to attend to some stressful situation. We just do not know and cannot always ascertain, the inner worlds and lives of others.  Refrain from critical or judging statements.  You may think it, but try not to allow for verbalization. Modeling this for others, our children being of high priority, is a powerful methods to facilitate kindness and temperance.
  • Connect.  Hug your loved ones.  Especially kids.  Look someone in the eye when you talk with them. Set down the electronics to show you care about what that person is saying.  Smile upon seeing someone, familiar or unknown. This acknowledgement of another’s presence is invaluable and greatly lacking in our daily lives.
  • Acknowledge a Person’s Struggle:  Offer help when you can. Do not fear if the need extends beyond your capability.  Many people assume someone’s needs may be more than what they can provide and do not even engage.  Offer help. Verbalize that you see someone struggling (eg “I am sensing you are having a difficult time today…”).  If you cannot provide the help, admit that. Understand that the offering of help was in of itself, healing and comforting.  Someone struggling and feeling IGNORED and passed by others is a heart wrenching experience.

This list could be infinite in length but the goal is to provide examples that cultivate an understanding and generate ideas of your own. As we all recognize, life can prove to be challenging and discouraging.  You can use your being to serve as a light and a reminder of hope during the darker times.  Just being willing to emotionally engage, listen, and offer a hug can provide another the strength and resolve to push forward.  I invite you to be this source of love, compassion, and understanding during times of negativity for others.

 

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ

 

Forgiveness: How it Really Works

Similar to the term Mindfulness, I hear a lot of rhetoric about the benefit of Forgiveness and its practice. Many vocalize its power in helping people to overcome and let go of past hurts.  As one might assume, I am a big supporter of people learning to transcend past struggles and to not let adversity identify their quality of being.

That being said, I want to make a very strong clarification about the practice of Forgiveness: It IS about acceptance.  However, it is about accepting that something HAPPENED, not that what transpired is OK.  Huge and critical difference. I see many folks leaning towards telling themselves that they ‘should’ (here comes the shame talk) forgive and that they cannot find it in themselves to do so.  When explored further, it becomes apparent that they are trying to convince themselves that what happened was acceptable.  Of course that did not resonate as true and thus, it simply did not work. Forgiveness is not about reconciling negative things as positive.

Forgiveness is really an allowing for, and an acknowledgement of, something painful occurring.  It is not a condoning of that hurt though.  It is also not about tolerating, enabling, or permitting negative or hurtful behavior. Rather, it is recognizing that something transpired and that the event is not a reflection of one’s own value. Easier said than done, I know.  Forgiveness is by no means an easy journey. Here are a few insights for you to consider:

  • Forgiveness is acceptance that something (painful) happened. Obviously, it cannot be undone.  However, it is NOT about trying to convince oneself that it is acceptable in order to forgive.
  • Forgiveness can be complicated due to it getting entangled with feelings of shame and worthiness.
  • Sometimes self-forgiveness related to the circumstances which one sees as perpetuating or contributing to the painful event has to transpire before forgiveness towards another can manifest.
  • Situations involving Forgiveness may highlight areas of attention and growth in self.  This can be a bit prickly to consider. This is not about blaming self for all that happened but recognizing patterns to prevent unnecessary hurts in the future.
  • Forgiveness may challenge us to recognize our inherent WORTH and recognize the value of our needs. Truthfully, people often permit and tolerate too much from others, internalize it as reflections of their value, and keep investing in that relationship with hopes the other person will reciprocate.
  • “Letting Go” may include processing out one’s emotions and/or a distancing from the agent of hurt.  One might recognize a relationship to be destructive and the need to put emotional distance. Even if this is seen as a positive choice, there can be a sense of loss involved.
  • “Forgive and Forget” is unlikely to happen.  One is not required to delete painful experiences from his/her history. These dynamics do not have to define a person’s being but they are part of our growing process.

In the process of forgiving, it is important that we do not resist the involved hurt. Rather, I encourage a validation and processing out of this pain. This can take time and patience.  We tend to try and reframe negative emotions, dismiss or explain them away, rather than just sit in the actual emotionality of a situation. Furthermore, when appropriate, we may actually cultivate compassion and an understanding of what motivated a person in their decision making. This does not mean their actions were appropriate, fair, or even healthy. However, we might develop insight into what launched the other person into his/her own actions. All of this processing may help externalize emotional junk not belonging to oneself.

Learning to de-personalize the behaviors of others can be helpful in feeling more at peace and less defensive in life.  If we develop an understanding that many people stumble through life, sometimes just trying to survive a moment, we may be better able to let go of small infractions.  Hard to reconcile at times, but other people’s reactions towards us are NOT always actually about us.  The irritable person at the grocery store may be worrying about a sick child v. really caring how many items you have in your cart.  This is extremely helpful to consider in close and significant relationships as it generates an allowing for mistakes. People can love and care about you,  do insensitive things, all the while without foresight that it may actually cause hurt. Hard to believe, but very true.

This ability to observe and respond, versus just react, is invaluable when dealing with unexpected, negative responses from others. If we can see people’s behaviors as a reflection of where they exist emotionally or in life development, we may have greater success in circumventing unnecessary stress or conflict.  It does not indicate that one person is more advanced or superior, it is just recognizing that we are all in life training and are challenged daily to grow. Some days our performance is better than others.

Forgiveness is truly about recognizing and accepting that a range of hurts have occurred and truthfully, will continue to do so.  It is not about tolerating unacceptable behavior or dismissing our own emotional responses to them. As painful as it might be, these hurts often create opportunities to grow, identify blind spots, and validate the value of our needs.

I want to convey a simple truth: People make mistakes all the time. Some are quite unintentional and without malice.  Unfortunately, some may also be motivated by ego and self-serving reasons. Regardless, you have the right to feel your range of emotions.  You are also deserving of repair attempts from others. You just cannot control whether these are offered or not. Your emotions are not the issue, but they may challenge you to assess the quality of your relationships. If a another person continues to persist in decision making processes that cause you continued pain, you are encouraged to evaluate your needs and if the overtone of that relationship is positive or negative.  You may chose to accept the limitations of that relationship and the inherent consequences of doing so. Or, you may also decide to distance yourself emotionally for the present time, allowing the other person time and space to (hopefully) grow. This can be the true ‘letting go process”, which involves recognizing that a specific relationship and person is not a match for you in this moment.  Forgiveness never obligates a person to persist in a relationship or dynamic that causes him/her great pain, sadness, or despair.  Forgiveness can be manifested through surrendering control, emotional release and expression, and relational repair.

 

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ

Synchronicity: Lead With Your Left Foot

Synchronicity is a term coined by Swiss Psychiatrist and Psychotherapist Carl Jung and he used it to address those times when there are ‘meaningful coincidences’. These are instances that have no direct cause-and-effect but are significant and of value to the person experiencing them.  A common day example is thinking of someone and then suddenly crossing paths or receiving a call from that person. Even if it has been years since the last contact.  It addresses those times where what you think and feel suddenly manifests itself at your feet.

Many people became aware of this concept through a documentary called “The Secret”.  It discussed Synchronicity and the Law of Attraction.  The underlying premise is that what you think and how you feel (e.g. desire), actually design the life that you lead. Essentially, all that you want can be magnetized to yourself through consciousness.  I am quite certain there are a handful of people snorting and rolling their eyes with this last statement.

Synchronicity really addresses energy.  Our thoughts and feelings have energy and the expression, “ask and  you shall receive” is really based on this. Despite how it is depicted in the documentary, it is not simply writing out an order form and waiting for life to deliver at your door like Amazon.  There is quite a bit of work involved and often, it requires a shift or change in the person.  Meaning, how you think, feel, and respond greatly impacts the effectiveness of these concepts.

I will use future blogs and videos to explain this concept in further detail. It can be really difficult for people to fully understand and integrate how this works as it defies the rules we have been conditioned to believe about life. Our logical brains tend to be the most disruptive agent to our progress in this area.

Synchronicity is real. I said it. I also see it as a way for you to connect with your higher being. To highlight this, I want to share a personal example of this. The other day, I went running when the sun was bright and the weather warmer (MN Warm, 40 degrees in Feb).  I find that I ground in nature and simply being outdoors shifts my awareness and mood.  As I was starting out, I was processing my discomfort with my recent shift in work and starting of a video channel and blog.  Though excited by the work and my desire to reach out to others, I feel exposed, awkward, and really uncertain about it all.  In weeks prior, I had received my intuitive nudge to do this new line of work. Well, to be honest, multiple nudges (I can be resistant at times).

As I was running about, I asked myself to give confirmation that I interpreted these nudges correctly. I expressed that I was feeling awkward and in need of reassurance. I requested a sign of confirmation AND one that I could validate. I continued running, enjoying the outdoors and my mind off processing other unrelated things.  Likely 15 minutes later, I was looping back and saw something in the road:  A yaktrack for a shoe.  I wear them on my runs and I thought it looked familiar. So I stopped, looked down, and noticed mine was missing from my left shoe.  Then I heard “lead with your left foot.”  I straightened up and literally said, “Huh?!”.

A few moments pass and an understanding unfolds:  I am right foot dominant. I feel sure-footed when I am moving forward with my confident rhythm and into the areas I know well.  The message was that though I was feeling uncomfortable, my awkwardness was not a sign of error and it would improve through practice. I was being encouraged to continue on and to do the very things causing me a bit of stress.  My request had been answered and in minutes from the actual asking.

I could have dismissed or minimized this whole experience as likely many reading this are doing so right now. However, I recognized the tone of these experiences and have learned to trust them.  Sometimes I feel a bit crazed, questioning myself and all that I know.  More so, I simply recognize this as the rational brain interfering with what it cannot explain. I have also learned to observe these rational mind responses and simply re-focus. These experiences, on both small and large scale, have always led me down exciting and fulfilling paths.  They have actually brought to me the most meaningful things I have in my life to date. Thus, I trust these nudges and communications more than anything.

If you are interested in learning more about Synchronicity and Law of Attraction, I will be continuing to write about it and am presently doing a series of videos to help explain them and how to apply them (2 are already on my Youtube channel). If this is something that does not resonate with you, I understand and I encourage you to enjoy all of life’s curiosities.

 

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ

How to Support Someone in Grief

Grief: What a long and complicated process involving various intensive emotions. One could write hundred of articles on this topic alone. There is a lot of information about grief and the different emotions and cycles people rotate through.  However, my interest is discourse on how to be supportive to someone experiencing it, not on grief itself.

On a personal note, I met/connected with my husband during a time of grief.  My husband has a strong and close family, most of whom live elsewhere. Shortly after meeting my husband, his younger brother experienced a traumatic accident and was hospitalized.  He nearly died.  Gratefully, he survived.

Though I barely knew my husband at the time, I sensed his despair. As a therapist, I was also greatly aware of the unhelpful and avoidant dynamics surrounding grief. So, I leaned in. I inquired about his brother, asked my husband about how he was feeling, and simply listened.  I have experience of learning to just ‘sit in the ick’ with another.  Nothing magical or grandiose.  Just a desire to be present.  The interaction was a matter of minutes. However, years later, my husband still references that moment and how meaningful it was for him. He was feeling so sad and so alone in his grief at that time. Simply connecting with him on a human level was helpful and needed.

Grief is a heavy and complicated process. The greater the love, the more intensive the grief tends to be.  It can be difficult to know how to be helpful or supportive to others during this time. Most people do too much. They take on the mindset of having to make someone feel better and move through grief.  This is not possible and your attempts to do so simply cause more added pain and hurt.

I want to remind that grief can be activated by different types of events.  We do not always recognize these as triggering grief. However, it is important to have an understanding of what a person may be cycling through. Here are common triggers, but please note, it is not a comprehensive list:

  • Death of a loved one
  • Chronic illness/Cancer/Dementia of a loved one
  • Facing one’s own death (Illness/Cancer)
  • Death of a pet or ‘fur baby’
  • Relationship loss through break-up or divorce
  • Sudden loss of job or home

There is a lot of avoidance when talking about death itself. You can see it in just language choices when addressing death.  Phrases like ‘Passed away, Crossed over, Moved on”.  There is a belief that these terms somehow assuage the sadness or sense of loss.  Truly, they do not and just add to the sense that we need to avoid talking about the things that make us uncomfortable.

If you really want to be helpful and supportive to someone experiencing grief, then you will need to first address and accept your own discomfort with the topic. You can be uncomfortable and still be helpful, that is ok.  You just need to own your discomfort and not try to reduce it by saying or doing things that make you feel better. The goal is to be available to someone else in a manner that is helpful to him/her.

Another critical suggestion is to have your goal be focused on being present.  Do not focus on making a person feel better. This is where things go array.  You simply cannot. There is nothing you can say that will make a person feel ‘good’ about the loss they are facing.  It is invalidating, makes them feel alone, and likely will halt any communication about their sadness. So please, avoid commentary like “It was God’s plan, S/he is in a better place, It was meant to be.”  This does not typically resonate with someone. More likely, they may display plastic smile and nod, while harboring thoughts of throat punching you.

Here are some suggestions on how to be available and sit with a person in their sadness:

  • Have communication about communication:  Tell a person you want to be supportive and invite them to give feedback on what that is. Let them know you are a safe person.  ONLY DO THIS IF YOU ARE TRULY CAPABLE OF ACCEPTING FEEDBACK. You have to be able to take feedback without personalizing it.
  • Learn to mirror:  It is like a dance but the person grieving is the lead. You are not to push, pull or try to make them pivot. You move with them.  You follow.
  • Ask questions:  Do not assume you know how they feel or what they need. This changes constantly.  Ask how you can be helpful. Ask how you can make them feel loved in that moment.
  • Touch them with permission:  Do not underestimate the value of a hug or sitting and holding a person’s hand in silence. It is enormously helpful. However, ask if you can do so before doing it. Sometimes, people are in a place of not wanting to be touched. If they say no, allow for it and do not view it as rejection.  It is where they are at in that moment, not about you or your importance.
  • Learn to manage your discomfort with silence:  People tend to get uncomfortable and fill space with words. These words are generally the ones that cause hurt.  It is okay to feel uncomfortable but own it.  Sometimes when facing grief, people just want to sit and be.  They want a presence, but they do not feeling like talking or listening.  This is a VERY helpful thing to do but most struggle with it. There is a sense of needing to do more. This is what I referenced as “sitting in the ick”.
  • Stop the avoidance:  Some people avoid talking about the personality that died or is dying.  There is a desire to ‘not upset’.  A person grieving is going to be triggered left and right. It could be a song, a place, or even a memory that floods in. Simply going to the grocery store and reaching for an item that the person who died love can activate it.  Just accept that this will happen.  It is inevitable.  I encourage you to talk as you normally would and if a person triggers, revert back to learning to be present and sit in it with him/her
  • Be emotional:  Do not avoid expression of your own sadness. Just do not make it the responsibility of the other person to comfort you. I have actually cried in session with clients. Some of the things people have had to face are brutal.  I own my emotion by saying “Do not feel responsible for my tears. My heart is just reflecting the sadness of this situation. You do not have to take care of me.” It can be extremely validating for someone to see another person resonating with the pain of the situation v. always looking at stoic, unemotional faces.
  • Realize the emotional journey of grief is long term:  There is no ‘getting over it’.  It is a matter of a person processing, over and over, the emotions related to grief and learning to live with it.  It will not disappear from their life. It can get triggered repeatedly for the rest of their lives. There is no resolution. It is a management process.
  • People cycle through grief differently:  Everyone is unique in their journey of grief. This can cause discord, especially in families, as individuals may express different aspects of grief at different times.  Because a person is not aligned with another in the same way does not mean they are not grieving. Allow for personal variances to emerge without judgment.
  • Recognize that people rally support right after the death of a person.  There is a falling away after some months go by. That is often when the real grief starts and a person begins to truly process the loss.  Do not be surprised by this. Commit to being one of those few folks who can be present when the realness of it sets in.
  • Do not equate lack of emotional expression with being ‘over it’.  People cycle through emotions and sometimes, there can be a storm ranging inside and a person’s demeanor is not reflecting it.  It might be that they do not want to share it OR, they have experienced negative push back from others and are scared to.
  • Avoid pushing spiritual or religious beliefs on someone: Death can really challenge a person’s faith or religious belief system.  Allow for this. Even if a person identified him/herself as strongly religious in the past, this can a tumultuous topic.  Avoid pushing attending religious services, praying, etc if the person does not resonate in that space.  You might find it helpful but it does not mean that s/he will. It is not the fix.

It is my goal in writing this that this proves to be helpful to at least one person.  It saddens me to observe how alone people feel in their grieving process due to the responses of others.  Again, most are intending to be helpful but are taking the approach of pushing people through their emotional process.  Trust in a person’s inherent drive to move to the other side of acceptance.  By being present with them, you actually enable this process without having to take ownership of it for them.

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ

 

Negative Emotions Are Not THE Problem

 

I need to preface this by saying I am passionate about the role that emotions play in our lives. I view them as guiding agents along our paths. They are not meant to be rationale or logical. They originate from our heart-talk, our heart chakra, and represent our best interests and desires.

As a therapist and an empath, it is really frustrating for me to see how negative emotions are stigmatized. It is inaccurate and really unhelpful to anyone surviving a negative state.  I understand that they are uncomfortable and most people would prefer to exist in a place of joy or peace.  However, though they are unpleasant and sometimes overwhelming,  they are not inherently bad. Often, they are indicators of needed change and shifts.

Some people recognize the value and need to fully experience and process negative emotions. They “lean in” and work on them until the emotional charge neutralizes.  These are a rare few and they have all done this process repeatedly. Thus, they know all emotions are transient and moving through (not around) negative affect is truly the only way to regain inner peace.

We are not usually taught how to lean in. This is not an innate skill.  Oppositely, we are blamed for having negative emotions. The issue becomes our feeling, versus the problem being THE problem.  Similarly, due to the high discomfort most people have with another’s negative affect,  people often make statements to help “push” us into a different emotional state.  Some noted repeats: “Stop feeling bad for yourself” “Don’t be __ “ “It was meant to be”” Don’t let it get to you”.   Though the intent is to be helpful, it is usually hurtful and makes us feel alone. It is already stressful to find yourself in a dark or low place. To feel alone in that space is even worse.

We cannot escape negative emotions. They are an inherent part of life. Dismissing them, ignoring them, stuffing them, cerebralizing them, and numbing against them DO NOT WORK. It may seem as though it does but only for a short while. As I will address in future writings,  these avoidant processes cause negative emotions to stay with us. Our bodies are a storage system for them. We might not always be aware of their presence but don’t be fooled.  They pop up like a scary jack-in-the-box and often manifest in over-reactivity and physical ailments. Unless dealt with directly, they just get carried forward into life.

In my practice, I have devoted a lot of time in teaching people how to manage the flow.  It is not a complicated process but it takes effort.  It requires one to feel vulnerable and interplay with the array of emotions they have resisted for years. Sometimes that work also entails repairing the connect between mind/body when numbing has become an automated response. This is very common with those with a background of trauma.

Negative emotions are often an indicator of us being out of alignment with our sense of purpose or integrity of being. This may seem not the case for complicated emotions, like grief, but I can address specifics in later writings. Generally speaking, negative emotions signal something is out of sync or not aligning as we need.  They can be stressful as they often alert to a needed change or for someone to address a stressful topic.  Sometimes, we may not feel ready to acknowledge that need and we spend time and effort avoiding the feeling. It has been both my observation and clients’ reports that they spent more time avoiding the work than doing it.

I strongly believe that it is critical for happiness and progression forward that a person has the tools and skills to manage the flow of all emotion. It is my hope that each person finds a safe place and person to share this with. Some people have friends or family that really know how to “sit in the ick” with them.  If not, I encourage those who don’t to seek out the resources to build that for themselves as everyone is deserving of a compassionate and listening ear. Empathy and validation is the most powerful tools in allowing a person to move his/herself into a more positive state.

 

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ

 

 

Get Out of Your Head (and Into Your Heart)

Through my years of experience as a therapist, I have come to realize that we have what I describe as two types of talk:  Head-talk and heart-talk.   I have also noted through observation and personal experience that we truly can convince ourselves of anything in our heads.  Quite literally, ANYTHING.  However, we are unable to manipulate the heart-talk and I have come to trust that language more than anything else. It always represents the truth and the best interests of a person.

A lot of people find themselves conflicted and I often discover that there is a great conflict between these two languages.  The heart says one thing and the mind states another.  People find themselves struggling and uncertain how to proceed forward.  There tends to be an emphasis on logic and rationalizing, believing the head-talk to be the safest and most informed.  I generally find it the opposite: It tends to be more fear based and restrictive.

Thus, I have spent much time helping people learn to quiet the negative chatter in the head and to begin connecting with this heart-talk. This tends to be a clarifying experience for most.  It wasn’t until later and with continued practice, that I came to realize that this heart- talk was actually a person’s inner-being and sense of intuition coming through.  I also recognized that the head-talk was actually contaminating a person’s natural inclination towards growth and contributing to a sense of being stuck.

It is in this discourse that I introduce the concept of Intuition.  People have very strong and negative associations connected to this term.  In the age of bloated brains, many deem such ideas as being very granola and flighty.  The reality is that we are all intuitive by design and nature. Granted, there is a spectrum of talent.  There are some who are strongly connected to their intuition while others have cut themselves off and/or have silenced their inner voice, deferring to reason and rationality.

Most people have had an experience in life in which they felt compelled or nudged into a certain direction or towards a specific choosing.  This nudge may have occurred in times of safety, such as a strange feeling that something or someone was ‘off’ and a strong push to leave the area.   Others may have had the joy of sudden rushes of creativity and ideas, or a sense of just knowing that one must move forward with a specific choice or task.  All of this is based in your inner-knowing and Intuition. The true intent is to lead you to your joy and happiness.  The difficulty is that it may require you to initiate change and pivot from all that you know.

I can honestly state that following these inclinations have led to the greatest shifts I have ever witnessed and experienced. Over and over, across all persons, I have observed this pattern repeat.  The nudges people receive often do not make sense in the moment.  Rather, they are supported and reinforced as the reasoning emerges after the choice is made.  I have also seen the negative consequences of when these nudges are ignored or rationalized away as being silly or without reason.  Luckily, life is often patient with us and tenaciously presents us new opportunities to choose again.

Intuition can be the strongest and most stressful when we hit times in our lives that require a dramatic change in our way of being. These are called “timeline shifts” and I will write about that in future postings.  Following intuition can require us to surrender logic and take a big leap of faith:  “Jump and the net will appear”.  It defies all logic, rules, and sense of know how governing our lives. Many may view our intuitive choices as ‘crazy’ or ‘impulsive’.  However, the likelihood is most individuals know of a person who took such a leap and saw the amazingness that followed.  For this heart-talk is the very thing that connects us to our happiness, joy, and life purpose.  The true reality is that the head-talk can kills these dreams with logic and fear.  We often hide behind feelings of safety, sometimes praising our good judgment and problem solving, but this stymies our expansion and fulfillment.

Thus, my encouragement is to start with small things or concerns, and practice taking little jumps of faith.  Follow that nudge or subtle pulling sensation. Watch all that unfolds following such choosing. I am confident that you will also see the same pattern and be more emboldened to follow your heart moving forward.  The heart is often knowing, even if we do not always want to receive its message, and it helps guide us along our path to the experiences and things we desire most.  It is not always an easy road but it IS the path of least resistance to your visions of joy.

 

I encourage you to like, subscribe or comment.  I am interested in creating an interactive community which offers information and support to others and a safe place for sharing.  You may also visit my YouTube channel for videos on helpful topics at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4D31k-hngy5DFj0LYIYTQ